Today I want to talk about resilience. Do you think you can turn a bad experience into something beautiful?
I have realized how this is possible.
In recent years they have come to light many / too many cases of violence on the part of teachers to children in kindergartens and to older structures to which we entrust them thinking of staying quiet. The most striking and well-known is undoubtedly the story of asylum Cip Ciop of Pistoia.
Leaving out the bad language that brings me most of the time this argument against these despicable beings want to tell a woman. A great woman.
It was the fall of 2012 and I had just heard the news yet another case and commented on Twitter my contempt for these people and to the institutions, as usual, slow to act. Among all the answers to that tweet I hit one in particular, and more or less went like this:
“Do you think I encounter when I go to the grocery or to the market…”
I froze the blood, I remember it like it was yesterday. And immediately I imagined instead of the mother and I responded by telling him how he did not take the law only because I, you, are good and expensive, but there are times and situations in which reason may very well go to hell and l ‘instinct of “revenge”, sorry is a bad word, but it is granted.
You destroyed the childhood of my son, the best years, there are movies that show and you’re walking as if nothing had happened ?! Are you kidding me ?!
I open parenthesis.
Let us remember that children who are victims of abuse, violence or any other bad thing can upset them in their childhood will affect them as adults.
What does it mean?
Meaning that if a child was raped and untreated psychological in 90% of cases (90% you imagine!) By large violenterà his children.
In the sense that a child beaten and abused heavily in 90% of cases will do the same with his family.
Knowing this, how could I be quiet, I do not get angry and ask why?
Why, you, teacher, you decide to do this job and then massacres barrel all those small and helpless creatures?
Why cry too? Why shout? Why not give you straight? Or why you were dumped and the evening no one fucks you?
You have no excuse for the gesture that you made, which is a thousand times. The you have to pay and you have to suffer. Suffer in prison for everything you’ve done to those who could not defend themselves. Blame someone able to defend themselves and then see if the game changes.
I close parenthesis.
Well, you know what this person has answered my anger bestial revenge?
“My son grew up with the example of the violence, I am a mother I have to teach them that it is wrong and prove the existence of justice even if you have to wait a while…”
I felt like a fool. I started crying in being aware of what I am still a child and how I would have given a bad example to my son. They are always too impulsive and it leads to ever good results unfortunately.
I write this article, today, thinking deeply about that mother first.
Now she has become one of my strong points, an example of a woman to follow and I want to thank you because without even knowing it helped me to grow and become what I am now.
When I met the case of Cip Ciop had not yet closed immensely and hoped she was all right and my disappointment in the institutions was wrong because there is always hope, because basically anyone with a little common sense we will even be somewhere right?
Here, last week there was the final judgment of cassation in this case. The judge ruled the prison and confirmed for two of those teachers. Respectively to 5 years and 6 years 4 months the other.
Ok, we all agree that a life sentence would be the punishment better but still a bit ‘of justice has been done.
It ‘was written a piece of history, and from now on all will pay.
With the closure of the case this mother could say to her son with tears in their eyes, tell him that the teachers bad they go to jail and the promise that he had made six years ago was maintained.
But this woman is not only great because they never gave up in this situation, not having closed eyes, pretending not to see, but helped his son every day to face the problem, he did cure and does tutt ‘Now, it was great just to the fantastic teaching them gave. He ‘also great because in these years he learned a lot of these situations has founded an association to help others. To try to prevent these situations, to give help.
There I already mentioned here while I was talking to a brand supporter of this association and now there speak a bit ‘better.
La Via dei Colori is an association non-profit organization founded in December 2010, one year after the discovery of the horrors of asylum Cip Ciop of Pistoia benchmark for smaller minorities and victims of abuse in the structure. Provides free technical advice and legal acceptance of psychological first level as well as guidance and information about where and how to move for the victims of physical and psychological violence, for family members and professionals. The professional association have always been involved in the prevention and training because sooner or later you will find the necessary means to avoid episodes like these. LVDC also provides a door of Psychological Help to which family members and professionals can turn to with problems or concerns.
Below is everything you need to inform or about how to help the association.
But that’s enough talk about my point of view and leave the word to the president of the Association, Ilaria Maggi, who I had the pleasure to interview last week.
1. Ilaria yesterday and today, what has changed? What is changing after the ruling?
“Without a doubt today I am no longer the woman who was six years ago. I changed all my priorities, I changed the way I see things, to see the world, to see myself, see my role a mother and a woman, and no doubt has also changed the way of understanding what the potential of every human being, for better or for worse. The thing in me though perhaps changed the most is the respect and confidence in my sixth sense. For several months in fact, while my son was in that asylum I had the feeling that something was wrong, but I never trusted myself and what I felt always asking advice and opinions to others.
Today, a few days after the judgment, I’m glad I had the proof that nothing is impossible and that when you really want something and you engage together so that to happen, the results will come.
I lost count of how many have told me that we could not do anything, that justice does not exist or that it was just deluded… I now know that instead all we have done, it was not a waste of time!“
2. The hotline is open from October 2014, how many calls come from and how exactly does the process?
“From January 2015 to date we have reached approximately 200 reports and a thousand phone calls.
In fact, the toll is only one of the possible modes of contact because the reports often also arrive via social networks, email, whatsapp or simple word of mouth among parents who have called.
Of these reports around 50% are for information, advice, request prevention or teachers who want to express their discomfort requiring support for prevention to burn out.
About 20% are reports concrete but not serious or recoverable and solved with methods less “invasive” than a complaint. In this case usually help parents communicate with the school leadership perhaps creating an ad hoc project or a course for teachers and families in order to understand the origin of the problem with the help of psychologists of our CS and fix it.
Two hundred reports in six months, of which 30% serious, they mean something like 60 classes involved and about 1,200 children in potential danger. Obviously they want to say also that the other thousands of kindergartens and schools have adequate facilities and well managed but it is true that they are impressive numbers that clearly can not be underestimated.“
3. You have several products in solidarity, illustracene someone. How do you choose and what features should be such a brand to represent you?
“In our Charity Shop products for the whole family, everyone thought and studied their best to represent us and to bring a message meaningful and important.
Among the products Buy Italian Style for LVDC for example we have the T-shirt Man/Woman and Child / a ‘If you believe x really come true’, because hope and believe in our dreams and the most important thing in the world and we are really convinced believing that strong in our dreams, they will come true and we want so well to our dreams and those of our children that we have created the bibs ‘trample No dreams’.
In the wake of the sentence of Bruno Ferrero ‘Protect is the most beautiful voice of the verb to love’ we created the body ‘Puppy (in) defended’, the shirt Maternity ‘Protected by now and forever’ and finally the shirt for kids ‘Mia Mom is a ninja’ because we know that for our puppies we will do whatever stunt just like a ninja.
There are many other products but I’m sure they’ll come to find out all about our Charity Shop!
As for how we select them we would say that has always liked the idea to spread our mission using positive images and movies that do nothing but incite hatred and violence. We would like to try to highlight the good things that work explaining that the joy and serenity are a right for all and that we have a duty to defend that right!
Most of the products we have chosen are products designed for parents and children, but not only.
Finally we would like all the brands that agree to cooperate with us would produce quality merchandise and soul. The colors are almost a MUST HAVE because of sad things in black and white and we see every day. Last but not least we would like to work only with people who really believe that a better world is possible, that they love what they produce and who believe in dreams. We would like each brand decided to support us and support us because honestly believe in our mission and it really feels to be part of La Via dei Colori Onlus as much as all the other members!
We would like the products of our Charity Shop can always be worn, displayed or shown off with pride to spread a positive message and resilient at every opportunity, and that they can always be food for thought.
Some time ago in an interview told us that ‘in the winter of life, we found the colors of spring’… So that’s the common thread that we would like to have all the products that we represent.“
4. Finally, leave us your thoughts on which to reflect. Whatever you want to say or add on the subject.
“The truth is that these are children who can do everything in life, but will always bring with it a scar, that sometimes, when the weather will change, it will hurt.“
Finally, after thank Ilaria for availability I would also like to thank all the staff of this behind her. By doctors psychologists, the law firm, reporters press office of the association, because all together they made a difference, we have believed and we still believe giving body and soul to a good cause.
So thank you. Thanks for what you do and I am sure you will continue to do divinely. Thank you for protecting our children and our loved ones.
Ps. Dear mothers, if you happened upon this article and some of you have even an inkling to his child or that of a friend or acquaintance or relative is happening something like that but do not know how to move do not hide, do not turn your head becoming accomplices. Even anonymously, help your loved ones to stop and prevent such barbarity. Denounced!